New Zealand was amazing. Breathtaking. And indescribable.
It's like a feeling you have that you can't explain to someone else unless they've had that feeling too.
It is a place where I think you can really only commiserate its glory. It's like God and Mother Nature got together and went ::plink:: put this here to remind humans that life is beautiful no matter how ugly it may seem at times. And they high-fived, slapped their hands together, and said "done and done".
My girlfriend picked me up from the airport last night. As we neared my house I felt like I was dragging my feet, kicking and screaming with the strength and unfettered determination of a toddler in tantrum, to delay the inevitable. Only my tantrum was mostly silent: "I don't want to be home", I admitted. A far cry from the frustrated girl a week prior; ready for her own bed again - whose frustrations lasted but a moment, till a knock to my head (literally, I got a concussion) reminded me of where I was. (I think that kind of thing is normal; to miss things. I'll trade back my bed now.) But the commiserating of glory was lost on her; it was just me looping the past 18 days and I knew that I'd be back at work - back to "reality" - in mere hours.
And I was. But, at least now I know what's out there. Knowledge. And confidence: International travel seems far less intimidating now. I can go again. I could go alone. The further away from this trip I get, the closer I become to my next adventure.
I will expand on my trip - with photos - in a future post. For now, a G-Chat Snippet: On Silliness:
me: DUDE, speaking of vegas. as SOON as i landed and posted i was at IAD fucking creeper JS Dr. Cox texted me
C: EWWWW. so. wrong.
me: "glad ur back :-) hopefully we can hangout soon. i'm on vaca all week heading to vegas tues to meet my friends from the jerz...back fri"
C: :shudders: oh dear lord
why? why does the world work like that?!
me: i have no idea.
C: he's clearly a text creeper. instant regret for you giving him your number. haha
me: I WAS BROKE. needed a drink. C:yeah I mean I do that too, that's when you "invert" a number.
me: oi thought it was obvious that i wasn't going to dinner when i said "i'm not going to dinner with you"
C: guys think "no" means "be persistent, you'll win me over in the end"
me: oh. no. no means no, kids.
C: except for all the times where it didn't...
it's only natural men would get confused.
I blame romcom's. and men just being stupid.
me: i mean, you can stand below my window and play music, but if i don't like you. i'm calling the cops. and if i give you a pen, i just am giving you a pen. i don't care what you're doing with your heart.
C: haha preeettty much
me: FG's "i miss you". whatever. it's understated. a ploy to get in my pants, perhaps. that i'm okay with. but texting me AS SOON as i touchdown...you just reached stage-5-total-creeper-get-me-off-this-island status.
C: [you could do] something as drastic as "I'm not interested, please stop texting me, I don't want to be forced to change my number..."
and that's cute that FG said he misses you.
kinda. better than him going for the direct "so when we gonna bang?"
me: haha. well. yes. that's true.
i said "i miss the internet" [while in NZ] and his response was "i miss you". which i found odd. lol
C: oh boys
tho i'm looking forward to a summer of silliness.
no boy [to expend energy on].
this is the first time...hmm. ever? my summers always seem to be caught up in men.
C: haha silliness is good
mso is girl-time
both of those things are exactly what i'm looking for this summer.
so i will take ego fluffs and girl time. others need not apply.
Tomorrow I'm leaving the country. I gain my first passport stamp. Tomorrow I leave for New Zealand. And I can't shake the feeling that life will never be the same. This is change and it sounds like jet engines and Kiwis and two weeks in an RV roaming around a beautiful country all the way across the world. I don't know why I feel like this is the pull of a life-altering thing; it's just a trip, I say, but the pull is there and here's hoping its all change for the better. Life, here I come - full steam planes and RVs ahead.
Sometimes, I think what we saw as an inevitable broken bliss was just a catalyst to send us on our way if we got misdirected.
I'm a cluster of nerves, excitement, anxiety and giddiness. This is going to be amazing. I know it. :)